Forest Star ~｡ﾟ☆ Winter Wonderland

Another lovely Forest Star has passed, but this time in a freezing Winter Wonderland.
We were playing music, dancing and raving in the snow 'til 6 in the morning.
And when it got too cold we just snuck into the big Tipi-tent to warm up,
and drink warm tea made over the fire.
I was in my sparkliest mood that night.
Dancing in an explosion of colors with sparkly snowflakes falling on you,
surrounded by beautiful people & to feel those beats and that bass pumping the music in your body is euphoric.

And some pictures that Luna took:

Longing for adventure

Earlier today I was looking at pictures and reading the blog of my three dear friends that are traveling around in Australia for a couple of months (or as long as they have money left).
I just realized, again, that I need to travel more!
That's one of the things that I absolutely love. Adventures.
I'm the kind of person that enjoys being away more than I like being at home.
I love to meet new people, see and experience new things.

So, when I've finished my studies I'm going to travel.
I don't mean like.. over a holiday or a few weeks. I mean, months.
There's gonna be lots of adventure, art, nature, creating, learning, MUSIC, inspiration,
experiences, excitement & culture. At least, that's how I imagine it to be.
That's what I want to get out of it all.

I think I'm the kind of person that needs to move around a lot. I need to be & feel in motion.
I just can't get stuck doing the same thing, living at the same place until my dying day.
I need to be impulsive and move with life, as it unfolds before me.
I'm more or less uncapable of making plans for more than 1 year ahead.
I just go with the flow, and believe that it'll all end up the best way possible.
But believe me, it can be very difficult being as stubborn and impulsive as I am.
The things I've thrown myself into without really thinking it through has either been a total disaster or ended up being the best things I've ever done in my life.
And now that I think about it.. even those things that was a total disaster, has led me to all the other wonderful things. Good ol' yin & yang, I guess.

Always

Repeating words until they're true
It slows the breathing
Pretend they never came from you
It kills the feeling

I'm not what you want
You said what I never could
We're falling apart
You said that we never would

It's not what I want
It's wearing you down
We're back where we started
No turning around
We're falling apart
I'm tearing you down
It's not what I want now

Before you walk, you'll learn to fall
Well stop and count to ten
We'll take these pictures off the wall
We'll stop and start again

I'm not what you want
You said what I never could
We're falling apart
You said that we never would

It's not what I want
It's wearing you down
We're back where we started
No turning around
We're falling apart
I'm tearing you down
It's not what I want

For always
Always
In always
Always

(Always)
We only go so far
It's not what I want for
(Always)
We only go so far
It's not what I want now

You're not in my heart
I'm wearing you down
I'm back where we started
No turning around
You're falling apart
I'm tearing you down
It's not what I want

For always
Always
In Always
Always

Alex Grey

One of my newly found favorite artists.
LOVES IT! om nom nom.

Sway away

One of the BEST things I know is to just listen to good music.
Light candles & incense, sit back, close my eyes and float away to the sound.
It's amazing what it does to me. It's like all this energy just shoots around in my body.
I love to clear my head this way. I dream away, or just sway. Euphoria.
And yeah yeah, I know. There's a LOT of music in my blog, but I simply can't help myself :P

One of the songs I completely love is 'Nothing Is Something Worth Doing' with Shpongle, of course.
And my latest obsession is Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross' new album 'The Social Network'.
COMPLETELY brilliant album.

..here's another song that is just mm-mm. Ticon - Less Is More.

Silver & Titanium

My birthday gift to one of my best friends.
I made an 'Ohm' necklace in silver & colored titanium, and the glassbeads was handmade by a classmate ^^
I love the result, and I love my girl.

Would You Buy This?

Do you believe in god?
Did you ever lie to your mother?
Do you like cake?
Do you have problems falling asleep?
What is your favourite colour?
Are you afraid of certain noises?
If you were an object, what would you be?
Do you eat too much?
Would you buy this?
Are you politically active?
Do you feel aggressive sometimes?
Are you nervous?
If you were an animal, what would you be?
Are you afraid of losing control?
Do you suffer from headaches?
Would you buy this?
Do you wear blue jeans in the office?
Do you like flowers?
Are you afraid of water?
Do you sometimes wish you were another person?
Do you masturbate?
Would you buy this?
Did you believe in santa claus?
Did you ever kill an animal on purpose?
Are you afraid of hurting someone?
Did you ever dismiss somebody?
Would you buy this?
Did you ever dream you could fly?
Are you afraid of fire?
Do you like music?
Did you ever get water up your nose?
Would you buy this?
Are you afraid of spiders?
Did you ever have sex with a person you didn't know?
Would you buy this?
Do you like reality shows?
Would you buy this?
Would you buy this?

Nothing Is Something Worth Doing

If a person can be in love with a song,
then I'm in love with this one right now.
I hear it in my head all the time.
It feels like electricity is running through my body
& I can't stop smiling.

Pins & Needles

FINALLY!

I've got The Birthday Massacre's new album Pins and Needles.
And I love it. LOVE it.

I'll probably be lost in this album for a while now.

Hang With Me

Will you tell me once again
How we're gonna be just friends?
If you're for real and not pretend
Then I guess you can hang with me

When my patience wearing thin
When I'm ready to give in
Will you pick me up again?
Then I guess you can hang with me

And if you do me right
I'm gonna do right by you
And if you keep it tight
I'm gonna confide in you
I know what's on your mind
There will be time for that too
If you hang with me

Just don't fall
Recklessly, headlessly in love with me
Cause it's gonna be
All heartbreak
Blissfully painful and insanity
If we agree
Oh, you can hang with me

When you see me drift astray
Outta touch and outta place
Will you tell me to my face?
Then I guess you can hang with me

And if you do me right
I'm gonna do right by you
And if you keep it tight
I'm gonna confide in you
I know what's on your mind
There will be time for that too
If you hang with me

Just don't fall
Recklessly, headlessly in love with me
Cause it's gonna be
All heartbreak
Blissfully painful and insanity
If we agree
Oh, you can hang with me

Love is Weird

So, this love thing.
What about it?

People often ask me why I don't have a partner.
I often answer that I choose not to have one.
When people ask me that I feel like a freak.
Like.. it's so goddamn easy for people to fall and be in love. But not for me.
And like the fucking purpose of life is to have a partner. Bullshit!
I'd rather be alone/sex-crazed whore my whole life than being with someone just
for the sake of it. I get anxiety just thinking about it, the walls close in on me.
I don't understand people who stay in relationships with someone they're not in love with,
or even miserable with - just because it's 'comfortble'.
And another thing, these fucking rules we make up, like we own eachother?
'You can't do this and that'. 'You can't look at another man 'cause then you don't love me'.
BULLSHIT.

I seemingly can't be in love unless it's destructive in some way.
Does this mean that I don't like myself?
Does it mean that I'm a sadistic freak?
Does it mean that I'm afraid of letting anyone in?
Is it because of my growing-up-experienses?
Or is it simply because I am too passionate, too complicated, too sensitive?
Or maybe it doesn't mean anything. Maybe this is just the way the cookie crumbles.

Or is it that when we fall in love, we're just falling in love with ourselves?
Do I only fall in love with emotionally fucktards because I am one myself,
and that's why it always ends up being a mess?
I sometimes wonder just how many hearts I've broken. It's not a pleasant thought.
Maybe it's karma coming my way?

I have what they call 'relationship-phobia'.
For a girl like me it's easier to obsess over someone who is unavailable.
Any man who feels available is someone to run away from, or push away.
This is one of the effects of emotional incest.

"Codependence is a disease which involves the being's emotional defense system being
dysfunctional to the extent that it breaks our hearts and destroys our ability to Love and be Loved,
wounds our souls by denying us access to our Spiritual Self, and scrambles our minds so thoroughly
that it causes our minds to become our own worst enemies."


Fuck it.
I'm going to create,
for my heart to mend.
I'm going to paint,
my heartbreak away.
I'm cutting my fingers with silver glitter,
bleeding my pain away.
And I'm gonna sprinkle all of my heart, all of my heart,
on my art.

Love is just.. weird.

Forest Star photos

I'm sorry about the REALLY bad quality, I took all the pics with my phone.

And these photos below are (obviously) not mine!
This great photographer took lots of beautiful pictures.


photo: Pierre E


photo: Pierre E


photo: Pierre E


photo: Pierre E


photo: Pierre E

I get goosebumps everytime I look at the photos.
Aaaah. So pretty.

Silver

There's something magical about stuff that you've designed and made yourself.
I finished my first silver rings today (started yesterday).
This was our first task, and I'm very pleased with the result.

free bitch

glitter

Again and Again

Was it all in real time or was it just in my mind?
Was I just a ghost passing through you
Clinging to the wreckage, till I got the message?
Hanging at the edge of the room

Give me something that's real
Give me half of your bitterest pill
Something from under the surface you actually feel

We say these words again and again
But they still sound the same
It was in your eyes, in your eyes
They were just easy lies

The little words are heavy and promises are easy
And no one's ever happy or sad for very long
Well just because I said it, it doesn't mean I meant it
I guess that was the way all along

I'm just shaping the sound
I'm just turning the syllables round
Dipping my toe in the water and watching you drown

We say these words again and again
But they still sound the same
It was in my eyes, in my eyes
They were just easy lies

And we've been a long time waiting
And it's been a lifetime in the making

We said "When you are alone and afraid
I will come to your aid"
Well was it just a dream, just a dream?
Because it was real to me

We say these words again and again
But they still sound the same
We say these words again and again
And again and again

Forest Star ~｡ﾟ☆

I can't really even begin to explain how goddamn wonderful this weekend was.

This girl owns some land in the forest, so she + crew arranged Forest Star, a psy-trance mini-festival in 'the middle of nowhere'.
I was honestly blown away at how pretty the arrangers had decorated the WHOLE area.
There was two stages, a small 'chillout'-area and the big stage.
There was UV-lights everywhere, and lasers twinkeling in all of the colours of the rainbow.
There was indian-tents, a blueberry-stand where you could buy all sorts of blueberry stuff,
a huuuuge fire and ofcourse the people and the MUSIC.

I never wanted it to end.

(Pictures are coming!)

My School: The beautiful Castle of Art

Iiih, silly butterflies in my tummy
It's been a magical and lovely first week in my new school.
There's art all day - every day in my schedule. So happy I could die.
And Helliden's boarding school is just SO beautiful.
I call it 'The Castle of Art', hihi.

My classmates and the teachers all seem awesome, too.
All the classes aren't settled just yet though, next week we're all going to choose
one art-subject that we're going to have once a week.
The subject that I'm primarily going to study is silver forging, which I'll be doing three days a week. One day a week well have drawing & photo lessons,
and then one day a week that free-choise-art-subject.
I'm thinking about choosing textile and sewing ^-^

Oh, and September 12-16 the 'silver-class' are going on a schooltrip to Denmark.
We're going to see Andy Warhol's Art Exhibition, have photolessons,
see and visit lots of artsy places. omg, CAN'T WAIT!


Here's some pictures of the School/Castle.
I took these from google, but I'm going to snap a few pics of my own later.
(these pictures really doesn't do the beauty of the school-area justice):